Five Clear Signs that You Have Found Your Soul Mate
Bowes-Lyon Partnership compiled a list of five clear signs that you have found your soul mate. We talk to the Director, Hayley Bystram of the elite dating service for professionals about how we can make the most of these!
Why are we all looking for signs that we have found our soul mate?
Romantic movies, greetings cards, television…..all of them convey the image that you have to find your soul mate and the person who ‘completes you’ as the representation of ‘love’! It puts quite a lot of pressure and expectation on a partner as someone who must fulfil all of your needs, all of the time! But a relationship is about working through things with someone and a soul mate is someone who you would like to be beside you on that journey.
Is there such a thing as love at first sight?
Such a difficult question – there are people that say they have experienced it and so their answer would be yes. I believe there is attraction at first sight, you can see someone and instantly feel that spark and connection but in simply seeing someone, without knowing them, it is hard to reasonably tell if you are in love with them.
Why is opening up such an important part of a relationship?
Open communication leads to good relationships – simple! It helps relationships grow and evolve. It allows us to share our aspirations and concerns, to support each other and work together. Lack of communication leads to frustration, misunderstandings and friction!
What sort of things should you talk about?
Things that are important to you; family, work, friends, morals, values, what you believe, what worries you….What you want in your future is of huge importance, you need someone who has that same vision as you so that you are working towards the same goal.
A bit of ‘me time’ is essential, so how can this benefit a couple?
It’s important to have that balance of ‘me’ time and ‘we’ time. Some time to yourself can help you relax, work out a problem or concern, enjoy a hobby or interest…. by understanding and respecting each other’s ‘m’ time’, the time you spend together will become that much more special, loving and enjoyable.
Everyone has flaws so why can we sometimes miss these in the early stages of relationship?
Everyone is on their best behaviour at the beginning of a relationship! It can take a while before someone’s flaws or idiosyncrasies come to light, particularly if you are ‘blinded by love’, and it’s whether you feel the same about the person despite those flaws, or if they are too much of a dealbreaker for you!
To what extent is there a fine line between showing your flaws and just not trying?
A relationship is about working together for the benefit of each other. It is fine to have flaws and even better to admit to them as recognition of where issues may lie. But if there is a lack of willingness to make any changes to help the relationship, which may be affected by these flaws, then things will go downhill quickly. For example, we mentioned how communication is vital in a relationship, maybe one party struggles with being open but with encouragement and guidance from the other party this is a challenge that can be overcome. If the partner with the flaw refuses to adapt or make any effort then the relationship won’t progress.
Why is maintaining who you were pre the relationship still important?
When you meet a partner and fall in love, it is you as an individual that they fell in love with so it’s important not to lose your identity and independence. Making sure that you have ‘me time’ can help you retain that – it’s what made you interesting and attractive to your partner in the first place!